Thursday, 11 August 2016

motherhood



Often I look around my house and I see the mess, all made by others, my sleeping children and my husband, and I wonder how it is fair that it is me that has to pick it all up.

Sometimes I look in the kitchen and I see the dirty dishes, the half eaten food in bowls and on the floor, the meal I slaved to make whilst my toddler had a tantrum and clung to my legs, the meal I chose because it was nutritious and contained ingredients I had on hand that would otherwise go rotten that no one seemed to like or thanked me for, and I wonder why I bothered.

There are times I am woken early in the morning, much earlier than I'd like, by my children who need me to feed them now, need me to get up now, whilst my husband sleeps for another long, undisturbed hour before getting up and dashing to work, clothes left on the floor and dishes on the table, and I long to go back to bed and ignore everything and everyone.

There are days my husband takes our kids out to give me a day off, my hero, so I do no cleaning, no cooking, no laundry and I have a day just for myself!!!!.... and the next day I pay the price and do triple time on all household choses and childcare to make up for the missed day and the extra mess left behind untouched and I question whether the day off was really worth it.

There are weeks when every little thing seems to tick me off... whining, tantrums, children not doing as they're told, extra messes and missing shoes and snappy words and eventually I reach a point where I can handle no more and I lose it.... at someone.... and someone points out to me that it was only a small thing why am I overreacting like that? And I can find no words to explain how minutes upon hours upon days upon weeks upon months upon years I have been doing all of this, caring for all of these people, people who often don't appreciate anything I do, who don't pay me to do it, who don't give me awards for doing it well, often at the expense of my own wellbeing - this has all taken its toll on me and sometimes I am unable to keep it together, sometimes I want to collapse and do collapse, this small thing is the straw that broke this mother's back......


Ya Allah, make all that we do as mothers done for Your sake and Your sake alone, for You are the one we need to please most, ameen.

Ya Allah, remind us of this when we face piles of mess, toys, food, clothes and bodily fluids to clean, remind us that we are caring for our families to please You and You alone and help us to do it with joy, ameen.

Ya Allah, when we are sleep deprived remind us of the day when there will be no rest and no sleep, and let us strive to make that day easy upon our souls, ameen.

Ya Allah, remind us when no one appreciates all that we do that extra rewards will be waiting for us in the Hereafter, and let us feel comforted by this fact, ameen.

Ya Allah, grant us patience and emotional strength when dealing with others, particularly our families and those closest to us, even during our most fragile times, remind us that it is all for You and if we can hold our tongues and walk away there will be much reward, ameen.

Ya Allah, make us of those who say good or stay silent, ameen.

Ya Allah, place around us other sisters who can help us through the tough times, who understand and sympathise with all that we go through as wives and mothers, who will bring us closer to You and who will help us in this life and in the next, ameen.

Ya Allah, make our children be of good character, make them righteous and pious and make them ones who will be good to their parents and stay close to their parents throughout their lives, ameen.

Ya Allah, make our husbands patient with us, help them to understand all that we go through, to appreciate what we do and to show it, and grant us a beneficial relationship filled with love and mercy, ameen.

Ya Allah, make us the best of wives and mothers for our families, let us be good examples for our children of pleasing You and of having good character, ameen.

Ya Allah, help us to refrain from whining, nagging, yelling and complaining
, help us to have constructive conversations around topics that upset us, ameen.

Ya Allah, forgive us for all that we do that displeases You, for You are the forgiver and You love to forgive, ameen.

Ya Allah, grant us jannah al firdaus on the basis of all that we do for our families, ameen.

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