Tuesday, 27 August 2019

The exam room, called life

Every day brings on new tests, to remind us this world, this duniya is an exam room and we are here to be tested.
Anything or anyone that enters the heart and we as humans put before Allah, will be used as tools with which we will be tested... Our loved ones.. Family, friends, children, parents, spouses, etc.

#ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire

The masks we wear..

Abuse is a constant in many lives, be it at home, at work, from life to loved ones, family, friends, colleagues.. Physical abuse is visible, the scars are visible, it can heal without much effort. 
Emotional and psychological abuse is invisible, it's inside a person. You may take note of a person's behaviour and think badly about them and say something is wrong with tgem not knowing that they are enduring or have endured extreme emotional or psychological abuse hence their behaviour is a product of that.

Some mask the pain, mask the hurt, mask the wounds and just continue with life. They soldier on painting a happy face and one will never realise that they go home and breakdown once the mask falls off.
A very important point made by Sister Naadira Chhipa at this weekends event.. Put yourself first, invest in yourself, heal your inner wounds or you will bleed on everyone around you sometimes unintentionally.

There are many coaches, counsellors, sister groups, support groups, get there and let out your pain, your anguish, your story.
Take time out for yourself.
You have but one life and any moment could be your last, live it alive, and not like the walking dead.

Sunday, 25 August 2019

You are worth it

I want you to remember something. No matter what they do to you, no matter what they say or how they behave. No matter how alone you feel or unworthy. No matter how long the days are or how bumpy the road feels beneath your feet. I want you to breathe, deep and right to the bottom of your toes. I want you to reach down into the depths of you, into your very soul. 

I want you to know that you are worth it. You are worth more that all the diamonds on this planet, more priceless than gold. You are valued beyond all the riches, the treasures and the money. These are just things. You are worth more that their fleeting glances and spotty attention. You, you are a soul more beautiful than all of this combined. You are worth more than all of these times by a thousand. You are priceless. You were born worthy. Never forget that. 

Ara Campbell

Saturday, 24 August 2019


Don't compete for WEALTH & STATUS in the race of life, since no single soul, even most wealthy, will ever win this race .
Their house maybe larger than yours, so make shukr both have homes. 
Their car may be later model than yours, so make shukr both have means of transport.
Their clothes may have designer labels, so make shukr both have clothes on your backs.
Their passport may have more stamps in it than yours, so make shukr both have a warm home to return to. 
Their gourmet dishes are works of art compared to yours, so make shukr both never sleep hungry. 
Their dedication to new diet, gym and exercise inspires you, so make shukr both have good health. 
Their children always seem to reach milestones faster than yours, so make shukr both have children. 
Their pictures of family is flawless, so make shukr both have loving families. 
Their qualifications on the wall may be higher than yours, so make shukr both have intellect. 

Comparisons and competition are endless,  yet we will all meet the same end.
A set of white kafan (shrouding) and deep graves. 
They trying to understand and memorize the Qur'an, so compete with that. 
They trying to perform all their salaahs with concentration and on time, so compete with that.   
They trying to improve their character, so compete with that. 
They trying to cultivate kindness,  generosity and respect in their heart to become a better example to family and friends, so compete with that.
They trying to help others, earn halaal sustenance, donate to charitable causes, run a feeding scheme, help widows and the orphans, so compete with that. 
They want to get closer to their Allah and beautifies the garden  of their mind with knowledge, zikr, forgivenes and PIETY so the love for Allah never stops growing in their heart.... 
Now that is your ultimate competition. Let us all compete in earnest for the highest stages in Jannah..

Wednesday, 21 August 2019


He woke up in the morning and found her praying. He heard her praying for him.He stared at her. It has been a long time since he has seen her praying. For the past few months, they have been arguing. Last night, they had a nasty fight.He went to the kitchen in a hurry to prepare himself breakfast.

These past days, she hasn't been cooking for him. Shock on him. He found breakfast already set at the table. He ate. He went back to the bedroom, to prepare for a shower. She left the shower. "Good morning. Have a blessed day" she said as she entered the bedroom and he left for the bathroom. After his shower, all dressed up for work; he found his wife at the kitchen, eating breakfast in peace. She was looking at some funny videos on her phone and giggling. He looked at her then walked out the door. The last look he had of her before he left was of her at peace.
That last look disturbed him. This is not how she should be. This is not how she has been. He has been hurting her, she has recently found out that he has been flirting with other women, he has cheated once and used money meant for their family on other women. She should be angry.Her peaceful demeanor disturbed him.

Tuesday, 20 August 2019

This is love.

And so there are some who spend their whole lives seeking. Sometimes giving, sometimes taking. Sometimes chasing. But often, just waiting. They believe that love is a place that you get to: a destination at the end of a long road. And they can’t wait for that road to end at their destination. They are those hearts moved by the movement of hearts. Those hopeless romantics, the sucker for a love story, or any sincere expression of true devotion. For them, the search is almost a lifelong obsession of sorts. But, this tragic ‘quest’ can have its costs—and its’ gifts.

Have you been in their company?

I've experienced many a toxic person in my life, even from childhood days.
Peoples constant criticism.
Peoples constant pressure to do things that I was not comfortable with.
Peoples constant disloyalty.
Being taken advantage of.
Being put in situations that is detrimental to an adult key alone a child.
Being used and abused for my helpful nature.

Today I give thanks to those people, for all that they afflicted on me and more.
I have clearly exceeded my expectations of myself in who I've become, while you are buried alive in your toxicity.

#ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire 

Nothing is impossible..

At 41, with health conditions at an all time low i took a leap and signed up as a property agent. Starting up entailed course attendance, studying and an examination.

I really thought I wouldn't make it.
My pressure was high, meds were giving me side effects. I had just come out of hospital and was still recuperating. My fibromyalgia flares were at an all time high.

And at many times dye to my failing memory, I just felt overwhelmed.
Surprisingly, I aced the exam. And sold my first property 6 weeks after I signed up as an estate agent.

Never give up on yourself. It's by Allah's grace and mercy and the angels that he sent into my life that constantly give me the support, strength and courage to never lose hope and continue to forge forward.

Today, at 43 I am continuing in my pursuit of knowledge to better myself and my business interests.

It's never too late for you to invest in yourself.

If I can, you can! 

#ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire 

Friday, 16 August 2019

Women of Wonder Awards

CrCredit to from @durbanmuslima (@get_regrann) - I am Shireen Mansoor.
A social media Marketing enthusiast and a Property Agent at Rawson Durban City and Rawson Berea. 
I am honoured, to be a recipient of the 3rd annual Panache Women of Wonder Awards taking place next Saturday 17 August at Izulu theatre - Sibaya starting at 7pm! 
Tickets available at Computicket , see you there.

#ShireenM #Rawsonberea #RawsonDurbanCity #RawsonPropertyAgent #DurbanMuslimaMediaMarketing
#PanacheWomenOfWonderAwards   edit to from @durbanmuslima (@get_regrann)  -  I am Shireen Mansoor.
A social media Marketing enthusiast and a Property Agent at Rawson Durban City and Rawson Berea. 
I am honoured, to be a recipient of the 3rd annual Panache Women of Wonder Awards taking place next Saturday 17 August at Izulu theatre - Sibaya  starting at 7pm! 
Tickets available at Computicket , see you there.

#ShireenM #Rawsonberea #RawsonDurbanCity #RawsonPropertyAgent #DurbanMuslimaMediaMarketing

Thursday, 15 August 2019

Saving yourself...

Everyone should take 5 minutes to read this. It may save your life or a loved one's life. In daylight hours, refresh yourself of these things to do in an emergency situation... This is for you, and for you to share with your wife, your children, & everyone you know. After reading these 9 crucial tips, forward them to someone you care about. It never hurts to be careful in this crazy world we live in.

The point I have reached...

I was asked to write a bio on myself. It's only when one puts pen to paper that one can recount a life of lost moments, achievements, milestones..

I can only say that I am where I am and achieved what I have by Allah's grace and mercy, by following my daddy's principles, by my hard work, determination and perseverance, by the faith of the people that took me under their wing in my worst and lowest moments and never gave up on me.

Every day has it's own mountains to climb, it's own momentous moments, it's own adventures.

Through the blood, sweat and tears, we reach a point of success.

#ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire 

Tuesday, 13 August 2019


A couple of weeks ago, I bought a fan. When I opened the box, I couldn't find one of the pieces. I called customer service, and they said they will send me a free fan. After I hung up, I found the missing piece (lol). So I called them back and told them that I found the piece (It was a thrilling night).  They said they already processed the other free fan and that I could still keep it. So I got an extra free fan which is awesome because I don't have an AC and my apartment can get pretty hot. 

Fast forward a couple weeks: I ordered a chair set, and the package kept not arriving when it was supposed to. Three times, it didnt show up by its promised arrival date. And three times, I called the company saying that I still didnt get it. Finally, the guy told me the package is lost and that he will send me another chair set. When I asked him, "what if I still get the lost package plus the one they sent me?" He said, " ma'am this package is lost and untrackeable and you definetly won't receive it."   The next day, I received the "lost" package and today I received the free one they sent, so I now have double. 

Reminder/Lessons my Heart received from this:

1.) Sometimes when we can't find things  (like my missing fan piece), that is okay.  Sometimes we are veiled for a reason. God chooses what we see and can't see. Because I swear, I turned that box inside out looking for the missing piece and found it so easily only right after I got off the phone with customer service and had already gotten the free fan.  We tend to hate not having all the pieces in our lives, but missing pieces are part of our journey too and they also serve a purpose. They are usually guiding us towards something we have to gain.

2.) God never delays a thing unless He is setting us up to receive more than what we originally expected. While I was calling customer service all those times asking "why my package didn't arrive on time," I didn't know that I would later receive double what I wanted. I was veiled from what I was about to receive. 

3.) What people say does not hold any weight compared to what God can do. Do not let people ever tell you that something is impossible. Nothing is ever too great for God. With Him, there is nothing "lost," nothing "untrackable," nothing that can't be found, and absolutely nothing He can't bring right to your door. 

4.) There is a baraqah & blessing in every delay. Just because we may be veiled from them does not mean they aren't happening and they aren't in motion. 

A reminder to myself first.

#ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire 

Sunday, 11 August 2019


The thing is, people will always always have something to say. They say what they need to and move on with their lives and we sit with their judgemental, selfish, baseless opinions, allowing it to lurk in our minds and cripple us.  

What will people say? 
The more relevant question is.... 
Why should you care?
These 'people' thrive on watching you squirm under their narrow minded scrutiny. The less informed are often the most opinionated.

Since forever, people have based their choices and often life determining decisions on WHAT WILL PEOPLE SAY... Hence we have become a society on a treadmill, we are working  so hard to please others when in reality it's never ever going to get us anywhere.... 


You can't get married too young. They'll say you're desperate for a man... 

You can't get married too old... They'll say you're desperate for a man... 

You can't not marry... They'll say you can't get a man.... 

If you choose not to get divorced... They'll say you can't stand up for yourself... 

You get divorced... They'll say you're ungrateful... 

Don't marry rich, they'll say you're marrying for money... 

Don't marry poor... They'll say you can't do better... 

Don't dress up too much.. They'll say you're showing off... 

Don't dress like a simpleton.. They'll say you're a slob

Don't cry.. They'll say you're weak

Don't be strong... They'll say you're cold... 

Don't eat too much.. They'll say you're greedy... 

Don't eat so little... They'll think you're dieting.... 

Don't, don't, don't..... 

So go for misery, buy unaffordable, go into debt, be single but get married don't be happy but be happy, cry but please not too much.... 

People will have you in a straight jacket doing cartwheels before they'll ever be remotely close to being genuinely happy for you. 

These people that we're trying to please are driven by envy when it comes to your career, beauty, intelligence, marriage and lifestyle so why are you waiting for them to applaud your success in life? 

You'll have a greater chance of seeing a fire spitting dragon walk down your street than seeing these 'people' happy for you.... 
Speaking of dragons.... Let's talk about these snivelling aunties that will record everything they see, from your clothes to your actions and then it's action replay when they all get together to 'discuss'.. "You saw what she wore" and "You saw what she did" 

Are we destined to be nothing more than this? We're either worrying about others or worrying about what others say... Both habits will guarantee a wasted life filled with things that don't concern you. 

Aim for success by worrying what Allah SWT will think. Our decisions affect our lives and dua alone will redirect the incorrect choices.

Mistakes make you human and laughing at the mistakes of others will be YOUR mistake because the people you mock and ridicule may not always know or hear what you say but your Creator does and since He is your Greatest judge, you're playing with fire my dear.... 

Decide today to take charge of your own life and refuse to be bullied by society that will always talk irrespective of your decision. Break free from the opinions of others and liberate yourself as their constant approval will imprison you and trust me, it'll be a life sentence because people will always have something to say..... 

Your life your rules!!

Rambling Muslimah 🌸 (fb)

#ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire 

Women uplifting each other.. Tell us your story

Saturday, 10 August 2019

Fighting the brain fog in the mornings

A Real solution to brain fog that we fibrofighters suffer from in the morning, is fajr salaah.
Dragging yourself out of bed for this pre-dawn prayer has helped in reducing the power of the fog. Try it

#ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire 

I am a Fibro fighter and this is my story

Aches and pains were there growing up, together with IBS, a weak immune system and other fibro related symptoms were apparant in my growing up years, but the gp's just treated it with pain killers, antibiotics etc.

With time I managed the symptoms, having to put food on the table I had no choice. 
I pushed myself to my limits always. I never was average, I was over and beyond in all that I did be it work related, or the home. I strived for excellence in success not just to succeed. 

Fast forward to my early 30's. I was pregnant for the second time and this time round I had loads of aches and pains. The Dr said not every pregnancy is the same. Other than the aches and pains I was good. Worked till a few hours before my delivery and had a really quick and easy delivery with no issues.

At the same time, my dad was in the last stage of cancer.. Bedridden. My mummy took care of him and I helped as much as I could. 
His passing away brought a sense of relief as I could not see his suffering. His suffering and his death changed my mindset and after some minor issues at the workplace I resigned after a lengthy service.

Health issues started creeping up on me, starting with bouts of depression. I started my own businesses, trading at events, teaching arts and crafts at schools. Again pushing myself to the limits to put food on the table. 

At an outdoor fair, one night I got really sick, next day Dr said I had a bout of bronchi pneumonia. 
Few wks later in the midst of planning my first fundraiser my baby got broncho pneumonia and ended up in hospital.

A week later after a successful event, I once again got sick, the dr diagnosed me again with broncho pneumonia. Meds were not helping, and my husband gave me his meds.. That turned out to be a huge mistake. 

I started convulsing and blacked out. 

I was rushed to hospital. 

Little did I know that this was the start of a vicious attack on life as I knew it.... 

To be continued.. 

To keep updated click the subscribe button on the site

#ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire #FibroFighter 

True colours...

In my sphere, I became a public entity due the work I was involved in. Yes, I gained a huge network but the downside is that the public started assuming they own me. Where I am, what I was doing, who I was with... All became juice to the public.
Amongst people, the jealousy and envy grew to the point that these toxic people that i started cutting out of my circle began a campaign to destroy me.
But what goes around comes around, through all my trials, tribulations I'm still standing tall.
I'm a fighter, and my fight for survival continues despite the backlash I face. The people that stood by me in my worst moments, are the only people that matter. I am grateful to Allah to have brought me this far and to have sent me the genuine support I needed when I needed it most.
In good times everyone wants to be your friend and in your circle.
In bad times.. That's when you see whose true and whose not.

#ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire

Collecting the pieces....

I was at the grocery store this morning and heard a loud crash and something shattering. Being nosy, I walked towards the sound and saw some people whispering and looking back to the end of the next aisle. When I walked down that aisle, I saw an older lady had hit a shelf and many things had fallen to the ground and broke. She was kneeling on the floor embarrassed, frantically trying to clean up. 

I felt so bad for her, and everyone was just standing there staring at her. So I went and knelt beside her and told her not to worry and started helping her pick up the broken pieces. After about a minute, the store manager came and knelt beside us and said, “Leave it, we will clean this up.”

The lady, totally embarrassed said, “I need to pay for all this first.” The manager smiled, helped her to her feet and said, “No ma’am, we have insurance for this, you do not have to pay anything!”

If you have read this far, I would like for you to give me a minute. Wherever you are, close your eyes, and imagine God doing the same for you!

Collecting the pieces of your broken heart from all the blows life has thrown at you. God will heal all your wounds. He wants to heal you! He wants to take care of your soul! 

We can have that same insurance and it’s called GRACE!

#ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire 

Thursday, 8 August 2019


I couldn’t help but wonder how many sisters in that room were in pain, and facing some trial, silently, and bravely, as we came together to worship Allah in prayer.

And you’d never know…

How many were calling out to Allah for His Mercy, knowing that He is the only One who can relieve their distress, forgive them, set right their affairs, and only in His remembrance would their hearts find rest?

Trials are the nature of this dunya and everyone is facing something, 

And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient, Who, when disaster strikes them, say, “Indeed we belong to Allah, and indeed to Him we will return.” Those are th ones upon whom ar blessings from their Lord and mercy. And it is those who are the [rightly] guided. Surat Al Baqarah: 155 – 157

I wanted to take a moment to make Dua for all of the sisters who are struggling , who are facing trials, who feel like their hearts have been shattered into a thousand pieces…

To: the sister who cried quietly in her salah ,

The sister who is exhausted,

The sister who is heartbroken,

The sister who feels overwhelmed with it all,

The sister who feels numb, because so much has happened,

The sister who feels disconnected, from people and from her Lord,

The sister who is lonely because she’s alone,

The sister who is lonely in her marriage,

The sister who cries every night, to her Lord, knowing He is the only One who can help her,

The sister who is no longer able to make sujood because her body is failing her… as her disease progresses, her muscles have stopped working. Alhamdulilah, she can still walk – with help, but she doesn’t know for how much longer,

The sister who is struggling with invisible illness – in pain and battling to get through each day, putting on a brave face, trying to stay positive and not let the comments ‘But you look fine’ get to her,

The sister who has been told by the doctors that she only has a few years left. They don’t know exactly how long,

The sister who has been trying for a baby for years, and endures regular hurtful and probing comments from others. She knows children are from Allah, but still, she feels the pinch of their words,

The sister who has had IVF so many times, but they never took,

The sister who miscarried, again, and felt like a piece of her heart broke when she lost her baby,

The sister who is trying her best to fulfil her obligations and take care of her kids, but is so so tired,

The sister who has lost someone she loves, and she misses them every day,

The sister who was recently diagnosed with cancer. They don’t yet know if it’s spread,

The sister who is battling cancer and the treatment is gruelling,

The sister whose eyesight is fading,

The sister whose child is sick, very sick,

The sister whose child has been hurt,

The sister who is struggling with anxiety, depression and other mental health issues,

The sister who is struggling with oppression,

The sister whose world has been devastated and her life shattered by shocking news,

The sister whose marriage and home is emotionally turbulent,

The sister who is widowed and struggling to get through each day, trying to support herself and her children, one step at a time,

The sister who is divorced and heartbroken, and trying to get back on her feet, one step at a time,

The sister struggling to find work, who needs to pay the bills,

The sister facing eviction and homelessness,

The sister who doesn’t know how she’s going to feed her children tonight,

The sister from Syria, whose city and country have been destroyed, who doesn’t know anyone that hasn’t lost someone they love. All she wants to do is go home, but she can’t,

The sister who is living in a refugee camp, relying on charity to feed and clothe her and her children. She’s alone , Her husband didn’t make it on the boat crossing,

The sister who is walking, carrying her children and the few belongings they managed to save. Walking, hoping thatl wherever they are walking to will be safer than where they have come from,

To every one of you, and all the other sisters who are facing innumerable challenges, my love and du’a go out to you . Know, dear sister, your solace and comfort lie with ;
Allah, Ar-Rahman, the source of our relief and the reliever of our distress.

He is Able to Do All Things. 

Turn to Him and cry.

Pour your heart out to Him.

He is the One who can bring you ease, who can set right your affairs, who can relieve thelp burden that is weighing on your heart and know, for your patience, your reward awaits you in Jannah, In Sha Allah 
a place where there is no sorrow or hardship; only eternal bliss and closeness to your Lord.

This life is temporary and surely we know we will be tested but this life will also be over in the blink of an eye, and the reward in the Hereafter is beyond our imagination,so hold on to Allah in your darkest hours, when you feel like there is no one else in the world.

Hold on to Him and know, with absolute certainty that He will never leave you, never let you down and that your reward lies with Him. He is the Most Merciful, and He is ever near.


As I posted this, it was a reminder to myself, first and foremost, that we never know what others may be facing in silence. The sister next to you in Salah could  be facing the greatest trial of her life.

As we pray tonight and every night let’s remember the sisters who are struggling in our du’a.

And as we move through this blessed month and beyond, let’s make the effort to be compassionate, to help where we can, to ease the burden of others if we are able, to be patient and to be kind to everyone.

A smile and a kind word to your sister might be a ray of light in the darkness of her day.

Your silent du’a for her might be answered.

As received.  May Allah reward the beautiful, kind and considerate soul that wrote this with an elevated status and reward you in both worlds for your humbleness. آمين يا رب العالمين

Monday, 5 August 2019

Do You Think Your Wife Is Bad ?

In the city of Baghdad, there lived a great scholar. One day a man named Zahir approached this scholar to complain about the manner in which his wife would talk to him. On reaching the Scholar’s house, Zahir noticed that the Scholar’s wife was speaking to the Scholar in the same way his wife spoke to him.
Zahir thought to himself, “I came here to talk about my wife’s ill-mannered speech towards me, but the Scholar seems to be facing the same problem I have been facing.” So he turned around and began to leave. Meanwhile, the Scholar came out and called Zahir back and enquired about his visit. Zahir told, “I came to moan about my wife, but when I saw your wife talking to you in the same way I decided to go back”
The Scholar explained, “I have taken up a forgiving nature towards my wife because of the things she does for me”. He continued, “My wife serves me delicious food each day, she washes my clothes every day, she raises my children in the best way, she goes to buy grocery and other stuff from the shops, she takes care of every need of the family, also she saves me from the bad things of the society, she is my comforter when I am angry, my friend when I need advice”
After listening to the Scholar Zahir replied, “I derive the same benefits from my wife like you do, but I never thought the way you did and never overlooked her mistakes and shortcomings.” I shall adopt the same nature like you from now on Zahir said and left happily.
Moral of the Story:
This is a reminder to every husband and wife to not complain about your spouses’ faults and shortcomings. Try to overlook the mistakes of each other in order to keep the marriage and the society peaceful. Hasten to forgive each other. Recall the past good that the other person has done in order to achieve peace and harmony.
Adopt forgiving attitude towards your spouse and see for yourself the happiness it brings to your life.
May Almighty Allah shower blessings to all muslim houses

Success comes from Allah and Almighty Allah knows best

The Blessings of Sadaqah​

There was once a person, from the people of Nabi Saalih (‘alaihis salaam), who had caused great inconvenience and harm to the people.

One day, the people approached Nabi Saalih (‘alaihis salaam) saying, “O Nabi of Allah! Make du‘aa to Allah Ta‘ala cursing this person (i.e. make du‘aa for Allah Ta‘ala to destroy this person)!” Nabi Saalih (‘alaihis salaam) replied, “Go, for you have been sufficed from him (and his evil)!”

On that very day, the evil person went out to collect firewood, as was his daily routine. On departing, he took two loaves of bread with him, eating one and giving the other in sadaqah (charity). After collecting firewood, he returned home, safe and sound.

When the people saw that the man had returned safely, and no punishment had befallen him, they came to Nabi Saalih (‘alaihis salaam) and enquired, “How is it that he has returned safely with his firewood, and no punishment has afflicted him?”

Nabi Saalih (‘alaihis salaam) summoned this person and asked him, “What actions did you carry out today?” The man replied, “I went out with two loaves of bread. I ate one loaf and gave the other in charity.” Nabi Saalih (‘alaihis salaam) instructed the man, “Open your bundle of firewood.” The man obliged, and opened the bundle. As he opened it, they saw a snake inside which resembled a log of wood and was biting one of the logs in the bundle!

When Nabi Saalih (‘alaihis salaam) saw this, he said, “It was through the charity which you gave that you were saved from this snake.”

(Az Zuhd lil Imaam Ahmad bin Hambal [rahimahullah] vol. 1, pg. 80)


1. Charity is a means of warding off calamities and extinguishing the anger of Allah Ta‘ala. Hence, we should try to give some sadaqah every day. Whether it is a little food or a few rands, it will definitely earn us reward and benefit us. Often, we narrowly escape some tragedy or calamity, such as a robbery or car accident, and we do not realize that it was through the barakah of some sadaqah that we had given.

2. Just as showing kindness to people is a means of earning their du‘aas, causing inconvenience and harm to people is a means of earning their curses. In this regard, we should be cautious and avoid hurting any person in any way (mentally, emotionally, physically, etc.) – especially our parents, as their curse will harm a person in this world and the next.

Sunday, 4 August 2019

My name is Fibromyalgia..

Do you find it really hard to explain your chronic illness to your loved ones, family and friends? Try this 🙂......


Dear Chronic Illness Survivor:
Hi. My name is FIBROMYALGIA 
I’m an invisible autoimmune disease that attacks your body inside and out, making you want to scream sometimes and cry. I am now with you for life. I’m so sneaky—I don’t always show up in your blood work. Others around you can’t see me or hear me, but YOUR body feels me.  I can attack you anywhere and any way I please. I can cause severe pain or, if I’m in a good mood, I can just cause you to ache all over.  Remember when you and energy ran around together and had fun? I took energy from you, and gave you exhaustion. Try to have fun now. Hey 
 I can take good sleep from you and in its place, give you brain fog and lack of concentration. I can make you want to sleep 24/7, and I can also cause insomnia. I can make you tremble internally or make you feel cold or hot when everyone else feels normal. I can also give you swollen hands and feet, swollen face and eyelids, swollen everything. I can make you feel very anxious with panic attacks or very depressed. I can also cause other mental health problems. You know crazy mood swings? That’s me. Crying for no reason? Angry for no reason? That’s probably me too. I can make your hair fall out, become dry and brittle, cause rashes, dry skin, the sky is the limit with me.

 I can make you gain weight and no matter what you eat or how much you exercise, I can keep that weight on you. I can also make you lose weight. I don’t discriminate. I can invade your skin, your joints, your lungs, your thyroid, your brain, your liver and any other tissue, organ or bones I wish.
 Some of my other autoimmune disease friends often join me, giving you even more to deal with. The list of my friends is quite lengthy.  If you have something planned, or are looking forward to a great day, I can take that away from you. You didn’t ask for me. I chose you for various reasons.

 That virus or viruses you had that you never really recovered from, or that car accident, or maybe it was the years of abuse and trauma (I thrive on stress.) You may have a family history of me. Whatever the cause, I’m here to stay. I hear you’re going to see a doctor to try and get rid of me. That makes me laugh. Just try. You will have to go to many, many doctors until you find one who can help you effectively. You will be put on the wrong medication for you, pain pills, sleeping pills, energy pills, told you are suffering from anxiety or depression, given anti-anxiety pills and antidepressants. There are so many other ways I can make you sick and miserable, the list is endless - that high cholesterol, gall bladder, blood pressure, blood sugar, heart issue among others? That’s probably me. Can’t get pregnant, or have had a miscarriage? That’s probably me too.

 Shortness of breath or “air hunger?” Yep, probably me. Liver enzymes elevated? Yep, probably me.
 Teeth and gum problems? TMJ? Hives? Yep, probably me. I told you the list was endless. 
 You may be given an ibuprofen, get massaged, and told if you just sleep and exercise properly I will go away. You’ll be told to think positively, you’ll be poked, prodded, and MOST OF ALL, not taken seriously when you try to explain to the endless number of doctors you’ve seen, just how debilitating I am and how ill and exhausted you really feel. In all probability you will get a referral from these ‘understanding’ (clueless) doctors, to see a psychiatrist. Your family, friends and co-workers will all listen to you until they just get tired of hearing about how I make you feel, and just how debilitating I can be. Some of them will say things like “Oh, you are just having a bad day” or “Well, remember, you can’t do the things you use to do 20 YEARS ago”, not hearing that you said that you can't do things you used to be able to do 20 DAYS ago. They’ll also say things like, “if you just get up and move, get outside and do things, you’ll feel better.” They won’t understand that I take away the ‘gas’ that powers your body and mind to ENABLE you to do those things. Some will start talking behind your back, they’ll call you a hypochondriac, while you slowly feel that you are losing your dignity trying to make them understand, especially if you are in the middle of a conversation with a “normal” person, and can’t remember what you were going to say next. You’ll be told things like, “Oh, my grandmother had that, and she’s fine on her medication” when you desperately want to explain that I don’t impose myself upon everyone in the exact same way, and just because that grandmother is fine on the medication SHE’S taking, doesn’t mean it will work for you. They will not understand that having this disease impacts your body from the top of your head to the tip of your toes, and that every cell and every body system and organ requires the proper amount and the right kind of medications for YOU. Not what works for someone else. The only place you will get the kind of support and understanding in dealing with me is with other people that have me. They are really the only ones who can truly understand. I am an invisible illness. I am your Chronic Illness.


(Remember our elders that have passed on during these auspicious days)

When a parent passes away remember that you have begun a new phase of birr (dutifulness) to that parent.

Birr after death is the truest and most sincere forms of birr because birr during their lifetime could be tainted with show-off, being polite (as opposed to sincere) and expecting praise from the parents or others. As for after their death, then only Allah hears and sees you.

A deceased parent is in greater need of his/her children - even more than when they the parent was alive. What children do for the parents during the parent's lifetime is for the worldly needs.

But after death only Allah knows what good and bad is in store for the deceased in the grave.

Du'a - i.e., supplication to Allah - for rahmah (mercy), asking Allah to shower the deceased with His mercy is invaluable for the deceased.

Through the child's Du'a, Allah - with His grace and mercy - enlightens the grave removing the darkness and expands the grave thus removing the suffering. And Allah makes the grave a garden from the gardens of Paradise for the deceased.

Therefore, always remember your deceased parent/s, and always ask Allah to shower them with His mercy, enlighten their grave and expand it.

For example as you are about have a meal think about the many wonderful meals your mother had prepared for you and how she looked after you all your life. Your heart will surely soften and at that point, let it drive you to offer a similar meal to an orphan, widow, divorced or needy person on behalf of your deceased parent, begging of Allah to reward them for it. Give charity on their behalf, recalling the many favours they did for you.

Never forget parents. No matter how harsh they may have been with you, only Allah knows the love they had in their hearts for you.

Remember them in your Du'a during sujood - the prostration - between the adhaan - the call for prayer - and the iqamah - the in-masjid call for prayer just a minute before congregational prayer, and in every act of worship and at all times.

Give charity on their behalf privately, wipe away the tears of orphans, widows and divorced (through charity) on behalf of your parents, quench the thirst of the thirsty on their behalf (by having a well dug, for example).

Go out of your way to be the best child to your parents for they have sacrificed much to raise you.

This is the Du'a for parents:

*رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا*
*Rabb-ir-ham-huma kama rabbayaani sagheera* {Quran surah 17, verse 24}

Translation : 
'My Lord .. Bestow thy mercy on my parent/s as they cherished and raised me in my childhood'

Lastly let us teach our children about this Du'a for one day we all shall need it.

Friday, 2 August 2019

I am a Fibro Warrior...

Qurbani 2019


Maria lived with her mother in a small apartment in NYC. 

She wasn't too young or too old.. 
not too short or too tall.. 
not particularly beautiful nor ugly..
She was just an average woman. 

She worked as a secretary at a large company and her life was pretty much boring and mundane. 

No one at work paid any attention to her...
Those that did considered her to be as boring as her life was. 

One morning, on her way to work, Maria saw a new hat shop that opened down the street. 

In a spur of curiosity she walked in!

In the shop was a little girl and her mother, 
who came to pick the girl a hat,  and another customer who was trying on hats...

Maria also tried on a few hats, until she found one she liked. 

She put it on and 
It looked nice!

First to notice was the little girl : "Mommy, look how pretty that woman looks with the hat on!"

The mother said:
"Ma'am, I must say, this hat just looks wonderful on you!"
The second buyer also came to look : "Ma'am, you look lovely with that hat on!"

Maria went to the mirror..
She looked at herself..
And for the first time in her adult life..
She liked what she saw. 

Smiling, she went to the counter and bought the hat. 

As she walked outside a new world revealed itself to her. 

She never before noticed the colors of the flowers..
or the scent of the fresh air..

The sound of the cars and the people.. 
sounded like an harmonious melody..

She walked as if drifting on a cloud..
with a song in her heart..

When she passed by the coffee shop she walked by every morning,
one of the young handsome man called out to her:
"Hey darling..looking good! 
Are you new here? 
Can I buy you a cup of coffee? "

She smiled shyly and kept walking..
Floating on her cloud...

When she got to the office building, the doorman opened the door and wished her Good Morning..
Never before had he even noticed her!

The people in the elevator asked her the floor she needed and pressed the button for her.

The people at the office, as if seeing her for the first time, flattered her on how lovely she looked today. 

The manager asked her out to lunch to talk about how she felt at work!

When this magical workday was over she decided to take a cab home instead of the bus. 
As soon as she put her hand up 2 taxis stopped!

She took the first one and sat in the back seat..
Thinking about the miraculous day she had and how her life changed!! Thanks to the new hat!

When she got home, her mom opened the door.
The sight of Maria took her breath away!
"Maria" she said surprised "How beautiful you look! Your eyes are all lit up like when you were a little girl! "

"Yes, mother" Said Maria
"It's all thanks to my new hat, I had the most marvelous day!"

"Maria" said her mother
"What hat??"

*Maria panicked.*

She touched her head and saw that the hat that changed her life was not there...  She didn't remember taking it off in the cab..
Or at lunch..
Or at the office..

She thought back to the store where she had bought it..
How she noticed it for the first time..
She put it on..
Paying for it at the cashier's...

And she remembered painfully now..
How she put it on the counter..
To get her purse out to pay..
And how she forgot the hat right there..
On the counter...

Then she walked out to the street..
Hat-less yet glowing!

It wasn't the hat that freed Maria, 
it was the quality of her thoughts!

*_Our thoughts can enslave us into a horrible bondage or liberate us towards sweet freedom: to be, do, or have anything we wish for!!!_*

This is called as Placebo effect..

Your mind is so powerful that it can create Poison as well as Nectar. 

You just need to know how to create it.

Thursday, 1 August 2019

The spoilt brat...

I was considered a spoilt brat by many in my family circle. 
Why you may ask.. 
Because I was the youngest. 
Because I was different. 
Because my dad gave me his time. 
Because he indulged into my little fancies on occasion. 

I felt my dad was hard on me in many ways. 
I could have had everything on a platter yet I went to work and soon paid for my indulgences myself. 
Financially, he made me stand ony own two feet and despite being knocked down many times after his passing I manage to drag myself off the ground and carry on. 

Life has not been kind in many instances and very kind in other instances. 
The best gift my daddy gave me was his time. 
The second biggest gift was his making me independent. 

The people that thought I was a spoilt brat, in actual fact were the spoilt brats themselves, always waiting for my daddy to bail them out. 

#spoiltbrat #ShireenM #DurbanMuslima #AspiringToInspire