Tuesday, 15 August 2017

The darkness of the mind:


Written by Naadira Chhipa

Almost every Sunday afternoon we take M.Armaan to the same park and I have become familiar with the other mums who are also trying to chase after an energetic toddler or pushing a pram trying to settle a little one. A mum who occupied a specific wooden bench every Sunday would greet me with the warmest smile and hello. We never did have a conversation but exchanged smiles and greetings. I used to watch her play tag or push her little girls on the swing and to me she looked like a picture perfect mum. I did not see her for over three Sundays, yet I noticed a helper attending to her three little girls, all under the age of six. I politely asked the helper about the mother of these girls and the news of her suicide shocked me. This was a young mum of three beautiful girls who hanged herself as she surrendered to the darkness of depression and anxiety.

I felt broken after hearing that news, looking at her girls I just felt a deep sorrow sink into my soul. She was ill, she was suffering inside her mind, heart and soul, yet all I ever saw was her smile. She was probably screaming for help, yet all I heard was her laughter. She was afraid, vulnerable and weak, yet all I saw was a brave, confident and strong mother. She was sinking into the depths of dark despair, yet all I saw was her happiness and brightest days as she spent time with her daughters. I felt hurt, why did I not speak to her? Why did I not notice that she was in pain? Why did I not befriend her like I did with so many other mums? The answer to all my questions was simple, to me she appeared to me a normal, healthy and happy mum. I was wrong, I was so wrong.

My lesson: Never take everything and everyone you see at face value. You do not see depression overpowering another, you do not see anxiety creeping into their heart and mind, shaking their soul.

You do not see the darkness engulfing the very core of another. Appearances are deceiving. The illness of the mind is often never taken seriously or ignored until it defeats you. It is not cancer, yet it can kill you, it is not the flu, yet it can destroy you. There can be so much sorrow masked by a warm smile, there can be so much despair masked by a cheerful greeting and there can be so much tears masked by joyful laughter. Let us always remember to be kind to every soul that we meet for we not know what lies hidden behind picture perfect masks.

To all those that are sinking deep into the depths of depression and darkness, please seek help as this is an illness that needs immediate attention and healing. Confide in someone you trust, seek professional assistance as you would when physically ill but never surrender to the whispers of shaytaan. You are never alone, Allah is with you and he will illuminate your darkness with the a beautiful light that will guide you in this world and the hereafter.
Suicide is not an escape, suicide is not a relief, suicide is not a cure and suicide is not ever an option.

May Allah heal the heart, mind and soul of all those that are suffering from the illnesses of the mind and grant them complete shifa. Ameen.
Never surrender to the darkness of the mind.- Naadira Chhipa

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